Not to Say I Won't be Tough

I've got quite

the future

ahead of me

I'll be rolling through

college

learning to lead,

learning humility,

and learning the facts of life

I'll be a poet,

a writer,

a biologist,

and a philosopher

I'll be kind,

respectful,

and independent

I have to be

I'll have new wisdom,

new faith,

new love

I'll be fair,

just,

and delicate

Not to say

I won't be

tough.

(untitled)

What are we even doing?

The Blue Ghost

it changed everything

i used to be overly active

a small meal enjoyer

being in the hospital changed me

switched me to a new system

the "eat-your-emotions system"

so i did

it didn't work out for me

i caught the blue bug, the blue ghost, the blue monster

and all those feelings really added up

and the remnants still haunt me

i don't see myself in the mirror anymore

who is this walrus?

but i think of how i'm wearing a 30 lbs training suit

that I can't take off

that helps

sort of

please don't judge me right now

the depression has only just been shed off

if you've ever been there

you know how destructive the blue ghost is

i just hope i can

help someone

the way others

helped me